Changes

I have been a Beehive adviser  in my ward since Aug. It's bee a fun calling. Not too stressful, It keeps me busy, We have a great bunch of girls. I've really enjoyed it and I've even been doing personal progress along with the girls. And I get to go to girls camp this week and I'm super excited. However, all things come to an end at one point or another. There were lots of changes in our ward today. We got a new whole new Relief Society, Young Mens, Primary, Nursery coordinator, various teachers, wards clerks, and yes there was a change in Young Womens. I was released as Beehive Adviser. :( I got a new calling though. They asked me to be the 2nd counselor in the Young Women Presidency. I thought "great I get to pretty much the same thing yay" I've known since last Tuesday about this change and didn't really think much of it. It wasn't until I was sitting with the Presidency in front of all the Young Women today that it really dawned on me and I thought to myself "Oh crap! what did I just say yes too?"

~myheadmeetdesk~

Soooo bad but ohhhhh soooo GOOOOOD

I may not be a chef. And to be honest I really hate cooking. I'm not an over the top health nut but I've been trying to do better things for my family. One thing I have done is all but stopped buying pre packaged foods. I try to make most things from scratch. One of those things is cakes mixes and boxed brownies. It's just as easy and taste better anyway (if you have a good recipe, thanks pinterest for helping with this). A downfall about this is that most of the time I have all the ingredients to make a super moist gooey chocolate cake. It would be so much easier to say oh I forgot to buy the cake mix at the store so we can't make a cake tonight. But nope the sweet tooth was having a fit tonight and it's hard to argue its point when I have everything on hand. Needless to stay the sweet tooth won the argument and I was forced to make this

Please forgive the messy stove in the background. Below is what it's supposed to look like but I didn't have vanilla ice cream it's one of those "sometimes foods" that I don't buy every day and its too hard to keep stuff on hand to make it lol. 

Normally I'm not a chocolate fan. I would have preferred a peach crisp. However because nobody else in the family likes peach crisp (or anything the has cooked fruit) I always end up eating the whole pan myself and I certainly don't need to be doing that. This worked out good I had a small piece then gave half to the neighbor :) 

I bet you wished you were my neighbor now. 

Sleepy head

I'm not quite sure what his deal was yesterday but he rolled out of bed around 8:20 this is as far as he made it. He fell asleep after about 10 min and skipped breakfast.

Around 11:30 he had rolled off the couch so I figured he was going to be waking up soon so I picked him up and snuggled him.......for an hour! He finally woke up around 12:30

I got lunch put together around 1:30 and while he was eating I notice cooper wasn't at the table anymore. This is where I found him. 

It wasn't until evening that he finally got active but as a result he wouldnt go to sleep until 10:00. I will admit it was quite the peaceful day. 

Busted!!

Shortly after getting Jammies on while finishing up our evening routine I heard a noise coming from the bedroom. He thinks he is so sneaky. 

Clutter Piles.

Need I say more? Perhaps I do on the issue. I like to think of my house keeping skills as "not too bad" I'm pretty good at keeping up on the dishes, the kids "usually" have clean clothes in their drawers, the floor gets swept mostly every day, and the toilets get cleaned before they start growing things. I will be the first to admit I'd rather mow the lawn and pull weeds then clean the house. And it's probably not the best thing that that gets done more often then some of the inside chores. What can I say? I love being outside in the spring time weather. But as a result of not deep cleaning every room in the house every single day (who has time for that anyway?) my clutter piles grow at a slow but steady pace. If you've ever been to my house you know that there isn't a lot of room and it especially lacks closet/hiding places so because of that the piles are in plain sight. There are pros and cons for the issue that I'm faced with. Pros are I can see it growing so I usually get to it before it falls over, and I usually know where everything is. Cons are Everyone else can see it and probably labels me as a hoarder, And ....Everyone else can see it and probably labels me as a hoarder...lol.

All Jokes aside I was thinking about this the other night because I'm feeling really overwhelmed with my clutter piles. I need about a good solid 2 weeks to clear out and clean, that is a doable task But I was thinking and I asked the question "what clutter piles do I have that are holding me back spiritually?" Like my messy house, clutter piles takes away my agency to have free time, to craft, play, leave the house, to just sit quietly and ponder and not stress about my do to list. But on a spiritual level What is taking away my agency from growing? I like to think our family is doing well in most aspects but we certainly have lots to de-clutter, bad habits to break, good habits to develop etc.....So then I got to thinking "whats really holding us back?" and for me it comes back to my everyday clutter piles. I have a tendency to stress over the smallest things to the point I get physically sick. I get stressed in chaos. I can't sleep if my room is messy.

I've decided I need to get my house in order so I can focus on the more important things. I'm thinking a yard sale will be in order as well as a DI run and trash man isn't going to enjoy stopping at my house. By cleaning up my clutter piles and cleaning out my closets I'm hoping to bring peace to my home and my home will be more inviting for the spirit to dwell and possibly more friends will come hang out with me because the strange smell will be gone ;)

WoW!!

My hubby sure is handsome! 

Couldn't have said it better.

One of my friends posted this article on Facebook. I can totally relate....

I am in a season of my life right now where I feel bone-tired almost all of the time. Ragged, how-am-I-going-to-make-it-to-the-end-of-the-day, eyes burning exhausted.

I have three boys ages 5 and under. I'm not complaining about that. Well, maybe I am a little bit. But I know that there are people who would give anything for a house full of laughter and chaos. I was that person for years and years; the pain of infertility is stabbing and throbbing and constant. I remember allowing hope to rise and then seeing it crash all around me, month after month, for seven years. I am working on another post about infertility that will come at a later date.

But right now, in my actual life, I have three boys ages 5 and under. There are many moments where they are utterly delightful, like last week, when Isaac told my sister-in-law that, "My daddy has hair all over." Or when Elijah put a green washcloth over his chin and cheeks, and proudly declared, "Daddy! I have a beard just like you!" Or when Ben sneaks downstairs in the morning before the other boys do, smiles at me, and says, "Daddy and Ben time."

But there are also many moments when I have no idea how I'm going to make it until their bedtime. The constant demands, the needs and the fighting are fingernails across the chalkboard every single day.

One of my children is for sure going to be the next Steve Jobs. I now have immense empathy for his parents. He has a precise vision of what he wants -- exactly that way and no other way. Sometimes, it's the way his plate needs to be centered exactly to his chair, or how his socks go on, or exactly how the picture of the pink dolphin needs to look -- with brave eyes, not sad eyes, daddy! He is a laser beam, and he is not satisfied until it's exactly right.

I have to confess that sometimes, the sound of his screaming drives me to hide in the pantry. And I will neither confirm nor deny that while in there, I compulsively eat chips and/or dark chocolate.

There are people who say this to me:

"You should enjoy every moment now! They grow up so fast!"

I usually smile and give some sort of guffaw, but inside, I secretly want to hold them under water. Just for a minute or so. Just until they panic a little.

If you have friends with small children -- especially if your children are now teenagers or if they're grown -- please vow to me right now that you will never say this to them. Not because it's not true, but because it really, really doesn't help.

We know it's true that they grow up too fast. But feeling like I have to enjoy every moment doesn't feel like a gift, it feels like one more thing that is impossible to do, and right now, that list is way too long. Not every moment is enjoyable as a parent; it wasn't for you, and it isn't for me. You just have obviously forgotten. I can forgive you for that. But if you tell me to enjoy every moment one more time, I will need to break up with you.

If you are a parent of small children, you know that there are moments of spectacular delight, and you can't believe you get to be around these little people. But let me be the one who says the following things out loud:

You are not a terrible parent if you can't figure out a way for your children to eat as healthy as your friend's children do. She's obviously using a bizarre and probably illegal form of hypnotism.

You are not a terrible parent if you yell at your kids sometimes. You have little dictators living in your house. If someone else talked to you like that, they'd be put in prison.

You are not a terrible parent if you can't figure out how to calmly give them appropriate consequences in real time for every single act of terrorism that they so creatively devise.

You are not a terrible parent if you'd rather be at work.

You are not a terrible parent if you just can't wait for them to go to bed.

You are not a terrible parent if the sound of their voices sometimes makes you want to drink and never stop.

You're not a terrible parent.

You're an actual parent with limits. You cannot do it all. We all need to admit that one of the casualties specific to our information saturated culture is that we have sky-scraper standards for parenting, where we feel like we're failing horribly if we feed our children chicken nuggets and we let them watch TV in the morning.

One of the reasons we are so exhausted is that we are oversaturated with information about the kind of parents we should be.

So, maybe it's time to stop reading the blogs that tell you how to raise the next president who knows how to read when she's 3 and who cooks, not only eats, her vegetables. Maybe it's time to embrace being the kind of parent who says sorry when you yell. Who models what it's like to take time for yourself. Who asks God to help you to be a better version of the person that you actually are, not for more strength to be an ideal parent.

So, the next time you see your friends with small children with that foggy and desperate look in their eyes, order them a pizza and send it to their house that night. Volunteer to take their kids for a few hours so they can be alone in their own house and have sex when they're not so tired, for heaven's sake. Put your hand on their shoulder, look them in the eyes, and tell them that they're doing a good job. Just don't freak out if they start weeping uncontrollably. Most of the time, we feel like we're botching the whole deal and our kids will turn into horrible criminals who hate us and will never want to be around us when they're older.

You're bone-tired. I'm not sure when it's going to get better. Today might be a good day or it might be the day that you lost it in a way that surprised even yourself.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

You're not alone.

Can I whine for just a second? It's been nearly 1 year since Chad started on nights and I just want to say...."Yup I still hate the night shift".......

Ok whining all done.

NOBODY MOVE!!!!!

You might disturb the beast! 

I'm guessing I had better keep a close eye on him later today it looks as though he is in deep thought planning out his next course if destruction.  

My child that is Cooper

Wednesday evenings are a bit crazy at our house. Carsyn has piano right after school then hurry to get dinner on the table then off to scouts and young women's. Tonight was no different. After I got chad headed off to work I changed coopers diaper and got his socks on. Then I sent him to find his shoes while I went to start clearing dishes from the table. He found his shoes and was excited that he also found the socks he had worn earlier. I told him good job but he already had socks on. He of course didnt like that answer. So while I'm standing at the sink doing dishes he pushes the trash can closer to me then tips it over. Now I know you're probably laughing about this temper fit of his but just wait it gets better. Remember I'm doing dishes and the sink with the garbage disposal is full so I was using the trash can to put all of the waist. So when he tipped it over, spaghetti sauce splattered all over the back of my legs.